Birth #3: The One Where I Found My Voice

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When I became pregnant for the third time, I was hopeful of something different.

But what I got was….”We will book you in for a Caesarean at 39 weeks”

No explanation, no discussion. No one asked me what I wanted or the options I had.

I was confused and devastated.

I cried for 2 days.

Then………something in me changed. I didn’t know what it was, but now know it was my power and determination for things to be different. Buried under obedience, fear and silence i was ready to rise.

I began to question everything. I started researching. I asked why. I stopped saying yes when I meant no.

I found others who believed in birth, in women in me.

And slowly, I started believing in myself too.

This pregnancy felt different- not just because it was my third, but because I was finally choosing to show up in a new way. I was not going to hand over my authority again , i was going to claim it.

I chose to birth on my own terms. I chose to understand birth , to listen to my body, to let go of the fear.

And when the day came I was calm, I was confident I had trust.

I put my 2 other children to bed as well as my husband and I moved through the night and through labor following my body and my baby until I knew it was time to go.

I birthed my baby vaginally, in my way, and I emerged not just as a Mother of 3; but as a woman who knew her strength.

It was the most beautiful and powerful moment of my life that changed me in ways that will stay with me forever.

This birth changed everything-it was the beginning of a new path

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Continue Reading….

Post Partum Depression: The Part I Wasn’t Prepared For.