Birth #2 The One I Didn’t Know I Could Say No To
After my first birth, I told myself I was fine. But underneath I was unsettled.
I stepped into my second pregnancy once again giving my power away. I hadn’t yet found the language to ask for something else, still in the mindset of “Dr knows best”.
So I went along with everything, the check-ups, the appointments, the monitoring.
I went to hospital thinking I was in labor, I didn’t know anything about the stages of labor back then- I just thought I was doing what was right. What I had been told was safest.
They examined me.
I was 1cm dilated. I wasn’t in labor.
And then………nothing.
I was left in a room with just my husband for hours. No one explained what was happening (which was , nothing) Just silence.
Instead of suggesting I go home and come back when labor started, eventually a team of midwives and my Dr came in and said, “It’s getting late. Your baby is big. Best we just go ahead with a caesarean.”
So, once again, I agreed. I was taken down the hall, into a cold, bright operating room, once again a passenger in my own birth.
Again there was separation, fear, loneliness, no transformation. Shock at what had just happened, again.
I went home to try to settle in to life with 2 little ones. The silence I felt in that hospital room stayed with me through the silence in the nights when I was feeding and crying and pretending everything was ok.
I didn’t know how to ask for help. I thought I should be coping. I thought this was just how it is.
But somewhere in me something had changed, there was a deeper knowing that things didn’t have to be this way. That birth and Motherhood, could feel different.
I didn’t see it at the time, but the seed had been planted.
Continue reading
Blog Post Title One
It all begins with an idea.
It all begins with an idea. Maybe you want to launch a business. Maybe you want to turn a hobby into something more. Or maybe you have a creative project to share with the world. Whatever it is, the way you tell your story online can make all the difference.
Don’t worry about sounding professional. Sound like you. There are over 1.5 billion websites out there, but your story is what’s going to separate this one from the rest. If you read the words back and don’t hear your own voice in your head, that’s a good sign you still have more work to do.
Be clear, be confident and don’t overthink it. The beauty of your story is that it’s going to continue to evolve and your site can evolve with it. Your goal should be to make it feel right for right now. Later will take care of itself. It always does.